The not so assertive Rachel..
So the dormant miser side of me is slowly gnawing its way out recently.. It is not that I tend to do so but recently I found myself struggling trying to get back what others owe me. I just do not know how to ask them for my money back.. Boo on me right?
To be honest I always have issues in being assertive. I just cannot say NO when my friends ask me for a favor...
Saturday, 13 August 2011
Tuesday, 9 August 2011
A girl knows that she will find her place soon.
She got her ticket, I think this time she is gonna use it,
She is gonna fly away and walk away of everything.
She is gonna leave and go away...
Too much corruption and hatred.
This young girl said that her mind is made..
No one could try and stop her, persuade her with their power any longer.
She got her ticket, I think this time she is gonna use it,
She is gonna fly away and walk away of everything.
She is gonna leave and go away...
Too much corruption and hatred.
This young girl said that her mind is made..
No one could try and stop her, persuade her with their power any longer.
Thursday, 4 August 2011
I always question myself.. Am I content?
The most important thing in life is to understand who we are and what roles we play in this great scheme of grand design called LIFE. Life is a curious thing really. We all have an understanding as to what and where we stand in life to a degree where I think is just skin deep. Most of us travel through time hoping to find the one thing that we never get, which is satisfaction. I don't think we can be truly satisfied. It's just the same as we will never have enough money. We are always looking and seeking for more. Lust for life is always going to nudge on the side when we think we have everything in the world.
The most important thing in life is to understand who we are and what roles we play in this great scheme of grand design called LIFE. Life is a curious thing really. We all have an understanding as to what and where we stand in life to a degree where I think is just skin deep. Most of us travel through time hoping to find the one thing that we never get, which is satisfaction. I don't think we can be truly satisfied. It's just the same as we will never have enough money. We are always looking and seeking for more. Lust for life is always going to nudge on the side when we think we have everything in the world.
As usual like a Boss, I will always be...
I am the kind of person who always allow my intuition to guide me. But there are times I just refuse to listen to it, even when it was screaming from inside of me trying to tell me that it is time to back up.
Well the typical ignorant me just wouldn't care and by that I got my pride thickening up on my face. Not exactly a bad thing since there's absolutely nothing attractive about a girl with little pride. But I have to admit that I am a very proud kind of person. I do notice it. Even when I am around my friends I tend to be like boasty and stuff, but that was all so innate I was always the type to judge people and having the thought that some people are just a bunch of hooligans trying to fool me or something and from there I got the hatred within me.. I don't react well to being nice or polite to people who just don't seem to have their respect towards me nor themselves.
Despite that, I have never been the one to have walls around me either. But I have been building these walls for years now. A few people managed to tear down these walls but when they left and bruised me in anyways the walls just came right back up, and this time it is going to be thicker and stronger than ever. It is thickening, even as I am typing this.
I am clueless on why the need for me to have these barriers around me so strong. Was I that naive about wanting to keep certain people away. As for now I know that I rarely let people in because of trust perhaps. Back then I was too good for my own good that some people just take forgranted of my trust and abused it. Although now, I am always around alot of people but I only let a few selected people in and by that I mean like "bestfriends" whom I could share everything with without hesitating being taken forgranted of. As for now, I am cautious, paranoid, and naive. Always anticipating the worst. Always seeing the good but always seeing the bad in people too.
I guess this all happens just because ..... just because........ not every human being are good at heart just as what you see based on the outside. I just don't go well with FAKERS...
SO JUST....
DEAL WITH IT..
I am the kind of person who always allow my intuition to guide me. But there are times I just refuse to listen to it, even when it was screaming from inside of me trying to tell me that it is time to back up.
Well the typical ignorant me just wouldn't care and by that I got my pride thickening up on my face. Not exactly a bad thing since there's absolutely nothing attractive about a girl with little pride. But I have to admit that I am a very proud kind of person. I do notice it. Even when I am around my friends I tend to be like boasty and stuff, but that was all so innate I was always the type to judge people and having the thought that some people are just a bunch of hooligans trying to fool me or something and from there I got the hatred within me.. I don't react well to being nice or polite to people who just don't seem to have their respect towards me nor themselves.
Despite that, I have never been the one to have walls around me either. But I have been building these walls for years now. A few people managed to tear down these walls but when they left and bruised me in anyways the walls just came right back up, and this time it is going to be thicker and stronger than ever. It is thickening, even as I am typing this.
I am clueless on why the need for me to have these barriers around me so strong. Was I that naive about wanting to keep certain people away. As for now I know that I rarely let people in because of trust perhaps. Back then I was too good for my own good that some people just take forgranted of my trust and abused it. Although now, I am always around alot of people but I only let a few selected people in and by that I mean like "bestfriends" whom I could share everything with without hesitating being taken forgranted of. As for now, I am cautious, paranoid, and naive. Always anticipating the worst. Always seeing the good but always seeing the bad in people too.
I guess this all happens just because ..... just because........ not every human being are good at heart just as what you see based on the outside. I just don't go well with FAKERS...
SO JUST....
DEAL WITH IT..
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